Posts Tagged ‘reader email’

She’s with Ehrenreich

June 10th, 2010

My good friend, Johanna Wilson, recently posted a comment to my last blog.  I find it so compelling that I’ve deleted the comment and reproduced it here in its entirety.  It is honest, humble (perhaps a bit too self-deprecating, though), and I think quite representative of the way people with cancer feel—and a strong denunciation of the popular view of how we feel.  This deserves front-and-center attention:

I’m with Ms. Ehrenreich in many of her objections to our society’s popular perspective of cancer.  Most of the “cancer people” I’ve spoken with don’t like the term “survivor.”  In my childish frame of reference, I survived chemo, not necessarily cancer. (It was the cancer that failed to survive the chemo!)  It seems to me that survivors are people who withstand a terrific onslaught because of something they did to promote their survival.  If you live through a catastrophic event as a passive observer, you just got lucky.

I also jump on the bandwagon of folks who object to the militarization of commentary on cancer: “battle,” “struggle,” “war.”  I don’t remember any battles or war.  I just remember treatment.  Likewise, terms like “brave” and “determined” didn’t apply to me.  All I did was have treatment.  My medical team and my caregiver put forth all the effort.  I just “took it.”  I certainly never wondered why more hadn’t been done in cancer research (speaking of Ms. Ehrenreich on that last point there).  I felt lucky to live in a society that could provide treatment, and I was lucky to be able to access it. (I know you share that appreciation.)

I may lack an important personality trait that promotes the survival of the species, but I just never felt any anger or sadness about having cancer. (A feeling of loss of control right there at the first, but that passed.)  Fortunately, I never wondered, “Why me?” (I’m always tempted to ask, “Who would you nominate as your replacement, then?”)  The cancer didn’t pick me. I may have actually contributed to its development with some lifestyle choices:  Poor diet, lack of exercise, stressful response to work, etc.  No one to blame except possibly myself.

What I did experience in my own cancer journey was an outpouring of friendship and caring, including the way out of the way side trip you and Greg took to visit me!  I am confirmed in the absolute knowledge that hair and boobs and fingernails are so overrated. (Well, fingernails and toenails are nice, but they’re not part of my identity.) For a brief time, my concerns were bigger than the petty irritations of daily life. (I’ve forgotten most of that lesson. Marty says I’ll have to repeat the exercise.)  Mind you, I’m quite aware that my journey and treatment pale in comparison with yours, but for me, it was a difficult time, but not a negative time. It just was . . . only bigger.  I’m not sure it’s any more appropriate to react emotionally to cancer than it is to an “angry sea” or a “merciless desert sun.”

That’s my story and I’m stickin’ to it! Let the games begin!

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Posted in advocacy, emotions, illness journaling | Comments (4)

“Five hours!”

May 16th, 2010

A reader’s email:

Five hours!  Few of us healthy folks do that … at least not often enough! As we learned in desert survival school, if something CAN grow, something WILL. And that is the history of our planet.  More things grow than die.  In the midst of cancer treatment, it’s a tonic to know that.

So glad you got out amongst the living!   When you’re living “in the valley of the shadow of death”, you need to bask in the light whenever possible.

I might quibble with the assertion that “more things live than die.”  After all, every living thing dies, and 99% of all species that have ever arisen have gone extinct.  And even if the reader’s assertion were true, while such a rule would apply to “me” (the original “me,” that is) and my new stem cells, it would also apply to my cancer with equal force.  Cancer is life too, and it is struggling to live, just the same as the “me” that does not include the cancer—a majority of “me,” the original “me,” the un-mutated “me,” but not quite all of me.

But the central message of the email is clear:  I have reason for hope.  And despite my usually squinty-eyed, suspicious, sardonic predilection, I agree.  And I am glad to be among the living.

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Posted in biology, illness journaling, social contract | Comments (0)

Plants are spiritually clean?

April 30th, 2010

A reader writes:

I have to tell you I disagree on your statement that “only plants are spiritually clean” on killing others to survive. Plants are as vicious as any other living organism. There are plants that release herbicides through their roots to kill or stun the competition. See examples that I found on the internet

http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2003/09/030909071258.htm;http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2007/10/071012084128.htm

and how about carnivorous plants! They are down right killers.

I would certainly not leave parasitic plants off the hook either – they may not shoot to kill, but they sure make their living out of other plants and even fungi.

There! That’s my 2 cents. ;-)

Agreed.  I spoke too generally.  I should’ve said, “some plants.”  And this just shows that the biological conflict I was discussing is even more pervasive than I described.  Life is indeed red, in tooth and claw . . . and root.

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Posted in biology | Comments (0)